The Word That Suits

Tuesday 8 July 2014

This Is The Day The Lord Has Made

Top of the morning to all those God's faithfuls who take the time to read my post, I pray the abundant blessing of the Lord on all my wonderful family members in Christ Jesus. Starting to write this post, I am a little blank on what topic to share. But the word of God which is the word of hope and comfort needs to be shared at all times, so I trust that the Lord will give me a timely word for someone needing it this day.

Psalm 118:24
This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.

The Bible passage above is one that is very familiar with a lot of Christians and even church goers. It is a beautiful thing to wake up in the morning and say what the psalmist said that indeed "this is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it," when all seem to be going well and one seem to be enjoying good success in all that he/she is doing.
But the truth of this two-lined passage as it is in the Bible is that the application of this passage in our lives should not be subject alone to the fact that all is well with us. Every morning when we wake up and have been given the gift to be able to see the light of day, whether we have challenges or not that day is a day worth rejoicing over.
Verse 22-23 of the same Psalm 118 says "The stone the builders rejected has become the capstone; the Lord has done this, and it is marvellous in our eyes." It will be a demoralizing thing to face rejection from those who are suppose to accept you, yet in the middle of that the psalmist went on to say, "This is the day the Lord has made, and it is worth rejoicing over.
The day does not necessarily have to go the way you want it, but it still the day the Lord has made and it is worth rejoicing over. You might have loads of challenges, yet it is still the Lord has made and it is worth rejoicing over.
The word rejoicing for me is the act of been joyful. And been joyful is not subject to what you are or are not going through, but that you are able to look beyond your current situation whether good or bad and then acknowledge and appreciate the awesomeness of the Almighty God Who is love and is full of power, and in Him there are no impossibilities or limitations.
When you have learned to look beyond your immediate situation, and make everyday a day to acknowledge and appreciate God and then rejoice in the knowledge of His power and might then you get your problems trouble rather than you been troubled. No wonder the psalmist said "This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." The secret weapon to challenge that which is challenging your peace is to look beyond the problem and determine within you that you will make everyday a day to rejoice in the Lord. Start doing that today and it will not be long before you start to see a difference in the positive.

You can get copies of my books in print and kindle format on amazon website via the provided links. I assure you of a refreshing knowledge of God's word as you get copies for yourself and loved ones. I am excited to inform you that for any of the under-listed books you buy on amazon website you get a free kindle copy of the same book, so hurry and get both the print copy and kindle copy just at the price of one.

Print Copy: http://www.amazon.com/Marriage-Rules-Engagement-Aderinsola-Obasa/dp/9789238045/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1391979264&sr=1-2&keywords=Marriage%3A+God%27s+Rules+of+Engagement

https://www.createspace.com/4309313

Kindle Edition: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B00HGHVPOU

Print Copy: http://www.amazon.com/Gleanings-Throne-God-Aderinsola-Obasa/dp/1490497455/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1391978770&sr=1-1&keywords=Gleaning+From+the+throne+of+God

https://www.createspace.com/4330620

Kindle Edition: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B00DKYKPKS

Print Copy: http://www.amazon.com/Because-Lord-Seeks-Godly-Offspring/dp/9789311818/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1394195129&sr=1-1&keywords=Because+The+Lord+Seeks+Godly+Offspring

https://www.createspace.com/4352171

Kindle Edition: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B00DW8E3O6

Print copy: http://www.amazon.com/Stressless-Toil-Aderinsola-Obasa/dp/978931180X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1391978664&sr=1-1&keywords=Stressless+Toil

https://www.createspace.com/4424550

Kindle Edition: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B00IRFF960

Print Copy: http://www.amazon.com/Sacrifice-That-Pleases-Lord/dp/9789311826/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1402088160&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Sacrifice+that+pleases+the+Lord

https://www.createspace.com/4748976

Kindle Edition: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B00KTNZLTI

Print Copy: http://www.amazon.com/Covenant-God-Aderinsola-Obasa/dp/9789311834/ref=sr_1_1_title_1_pap?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1391979535&sr=1-1&keywords=Covenant+of+God

https://www.createspace.com/4636178

Kindle Edition: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B00I1W8WRW

Wednesday 2 July 2014

Marching On In His Presence

Exodus 33:1-3, 12, 14-16
Then the Lord said to Moses, "Leave this place, you and the people you brought up out of Egypt, and go to the land I promised on oath to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, saying, 'I will give it to your descendants.' I will send an angel before you and drive out the Canaanites, Amorites, Hittites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites. Go up to the land flowing with milk and honey. But I will not go with you, because you are a stiff-necked people and I might destroy you on the way."

Moses said to the Lord, "You have been telling me, 'Lead these people,' but you have not let me know whom you will send with me. You have said, 'I know you by name and you have found favour with me.'

The Lord replied, "My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest." Then Moses said to him, "If your Presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here. How will anyone know that you are pleased with me and your people unless you you go with us? What else will distinguish me and your people from all the other people on the face of the earth?

At the beginning of this year, for the first few days of the first month of this year, I prayed to the Lord for the year on behalf of myself and my family. I sought God's face for a revelation of what the year will hold for me and my family as He ushered us into the new year and the Lord gave me just this sentence "My Presence will go with you into the year." This was a promise that I got from God after I had fasted and prayed and committed the year into His hands. And I am here testifying that I have indeed enjoyed the goodness of God in the first half of the year.
When we consider the passage above, the Lord had promised the children of Israel a land flowing with milk and honey and he was in fact telling them to go and take possession of their inheritance. The victory over their enemies was already promised and there was abundance in the land they were going in to possess. He even promised that an angel will go before them to drive out their enemies before them, but there was something about the Presence of God that was worth all the prayers for. Moses was not just contented with the victories that was promised or the provisions that they were going to possess, he wanted something more. Moses asked God that, what will distinguish him and the people of Israel from all the other people on the face of the earth if not the Presence of God.
The angels can ensure victory, the land can birth forth its treasures for Israel as it would for the other people on the face of the earth, but what will make Israel stand out from every other nation was the Presence of the Almighty God.
Now, no matter what you have been told that awaits you in the second half of this year, but without the Presence of God going with you, you are going empty. If you have received a word of promise from the Lord and He has assured you that the remaining part of this year holds for you great riches and abundance of all that you desire, please don't stop there, seek the Lord and ask the question that "Lord who are you sending with me?" Don't stay contented in the promise alone, seek that the Presence of God goes with you as you march on to possess the promise of God for your life in the remaining part of the year.

2 Samuel 6:11
The ark of the Lord remained in the house of Obed-Edom the Gittite for three months, and the Lord blessed him and his entire household.

Just before I end this, I want us to look at the impact of the Presence of God in the life of a man. The passage above stated that as the ark of the Lord remained in the house of Obed-Edom, the Lord blessed him and his household. Obed-Edom was an Israelite living in the land flowing with milk and honey which the Lord swore to Abraham, but when the ark of God entered into his house there was a special blessing bestowed on him and his household as a result of that ark. The distinguishing factor between Obed-Edom and all the other people around him was the presence of the ark of the Lord in his house.
So I will encourage all those reading this piece, that in truth you will enjoy the goodness of God as you march into the second half of this year, but you will enjoying a distinguishing blessing of God as you march into the second half of this year in the Presence of God. So don't just pray for the blessing of the Lord seek the Presence of God.

You can get copies of my books in print and kindle format on amazon website via the provided links. I assure you of a refreshing knowledge of God's word as you get copies for yourself and loved ones. I am excited to inform you that for any of the under-listed books you buy on amazon website you get a free kindle copy of the same book, so hurry and get both the print copy and kindle copy just at the price of one.

Print Copy: http://www.amazon.com/Stressless-Toil-Aderinsola-Obasa/dp/978931180X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1391978664&sr=1-1&keywords=Stressless+Toil

https://www.createspace.com/4424550

Kindle Edition: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B00IRFF960

Tuesday 1 July 2014

Going On With God's Presence

I bless God for another opportunity to share a word with the people of God who take time to read my post. It's been a while since I shared something on my blog and I sincerely apologize for the break. The demands of a new baby in my life is the pleasing reason why I had to take the break, but I pray to God that as we start a new month and go into the second half of this year, I will be able to take time out to share the truth of God's word again and again.
I join many of God's people to thank and bless the name of the living God for the gift of seeing a new month and in fact seeing the beginning of the second half of the year. For those who still have loads of prayer request yet to be answered, I trust the Lord that as we begin the second half of the year God will show up in the areas of your lives where you still need His divine touch and your expectations in Christ will not be cut short in Jesus name.
A little over a month ago I started a Bible reading plan that will take me into reading the whole Bible in 6months and though I have read the Bible through once before, I still find it very refreshing and revealing to read through the Bible again. You know we cannot have enough of the word of God.
I have learned so much in the 45days of my tour of the Bible and some of the things I learned again in my reading are worth sharing.

Genesis 28:13-15
There above it stood the Lord, and he said: "I am the Lord, the God of your father Abraham and the God of Isaac. I will give you and your descendants the land on which you are lying. Your descendants will be like the dust of the earth, and you will spread out to the west and to the east, to the north and to the south. All the peoples on earth will be blessed through you and your offspring. I am with you and will watch over you until I have done what I have promised you."

Genesis 39:2, 20-21
The Lord was with Joseph and he prospered, and he lived in the house of his Egyptian master.

Joseph's master took him and put him in prison, the place where the king's prisoners were confined.
But while Joseph was there in prison, the Lord was with him; he showed him kindness and granted him favour in the eyes of the prison warder.

I want to speak to the hearts of those of us who in truth carry the presence of God in us. By the special grace of God I want to us to understand and know that the unpleasant situation or rather the expectant state that you are in has not in any way erased the truth of the fact that God is with you and He is watching over you.
In Genesis 28, Jacob was on his way to his uncle's place in Haran. He was not going there to live as a son but to serve his uncle as servant yet God was with him. As he served Laban his uncle and master, he carried in him the presence of God.
The presence of God was with Joseph as he served under his Egyptian master, all through his ordeal as he journeyed to prison, he carried the presence of God with him. So I learned that my present challenge or trial as it may be has not eroded the truth that God is with me and he is watching me. And that is what I want the person reading this piece to hold very dear to his/her heart.
True you are living right and living in the fear of God and you wonder why you are going through such tough terrain in life's journey. But in the middle of all the struggle the presence of God is with you and the Lord is watching to ensure that you are not tempted beyond your ability.
But the most beautiful truth of all is that none of those who carried the presence of God in them had a bad ending. The road might be rough, but the end of the journey made the process worth the while.
Jacob left the service of Laban a wealthy and fulfilled man. His company was large and his possession was much. Likewise Joseph ended his life as the prime minister of Egypt, he was boss over all, even over those who throw him into the situation.
So as you start into the second half of the year, look beyond those things you are still hopeful in God for, look beyond the financial mess, beyond the sickness, beyond the marital troubles and whatever it is that might be troubling your mind and seek to enter into the second half of this year with the presence of God going with you. Hold on to God till you hear Him say to you "I am with you and will watch over you" and you are rest secure that the remaining part of this year is going to be well with you.

You can get copies of my books in print and kindle format on amazon website via the provided links. I assure you of a refreshing knowledge of God's word as you get copies for yourself and loved ones. I am excited to inform you that for any of the under-listed books you buy on amazon website you get a free kindle copy of the same book, so hurry and get both the print copy and kindle copy just at the price of one.

Print Copy: http://www.amazon.com/Because-Lord-Seeks-Godly-Offspring/dp/9789311818/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1394195129&sr=1-1&keywords=Because+The+Lord+Seeks+Godly+Offspring
https://www.createspace.com/4352171

Kindle Edition: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B00DW8E3O6

Friday 6 June 2014

Having Faith In The Midst Of Trials

I feel a need to speak to someone who has been waiting on the Lord for some form of miracle and it appears as though time is running out on you. Somewhere down in your spirit there is a struggle with the thought that can God really come through for you in that situation or not. And then the devil has been taking time to remind you of past disappointments that you seem to forget the past blessings.
I have just experienced this situation in my life and to the glory of God I have overcome. It’s not that I have a miracle at hand, but I have been able to look beyond my struggle and see the God who has the might and power to make all things abound to me. I have renewed my faith in the God who calls the things that be not as though they where and who brings forth the seen from the unseen.
No matter the level we are at in our walk and relationship with God, several times our faith gets tested. This testing comes in diverse ways, sometimes it could be financial needs, health needs, worries over children etc, but in truth on the pathway of life we will have challenges and our ability to trust and hold unto God through this challenges will be tested many times over. Sometimes we are tempted to give up on our faith, sometimes we ask God question.
All these are not out of place, but what the problem will then be is if we are unable to get past our inner struggle that fights our faith in God. When there seem to be a delay in what you expect the Lord to do for you, it’s not the time to give up, but rather the time to intensify your faith and look up to God. I have always heard it said that the night is darkest just before down, and also that the battle is most fierce just before victory comes. So when you think that you can’t take the challenges anymore, that is the most appropriate time to fix your gaze on Jesus alone.

Romans 4:18-21
Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, “So shall your off spring be.” Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead - since he was about a hundred years old - and that Sarah’s womb was also dead. Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God being fully persuaded God had power to do what he had promised.

This passage as helped my faith a great deal. There is the need to live in the consciousness that no matter the challenge we might be facing, it is never beyond the power and might of God. As a true child of God, His promises are yours for keeps and that will definitely manifest at His own appropriate timing, because God will not promise what He does not intend to make happen. He is not a man that He should lie and His words will never fail.
Abraham knew this truth about God, he had walked with God well enough to conclude in his heart that God has the power to do what He had promised.
The devil always use past disappointments to try to destablise our faith. In the inner struggles of our heart as we pass through life’s challenges, one is continually reminded of past failures that tends to make you conclude its not worth trying again and you just tend to give up in the middle of the struggle and conclude it can never get better, or maybe that is how it's meant to be. Well you are not designed to drown in struggles and challenges, they only come as a test of faith and will pass away once you are able to defeat the struggle. The thought of God towards us is of good, to give us hope and bring us to an expected end.

Mark 5:25-29
And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years. She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent all she had, yet the instead of getting better she grew worse. When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, because she thought, “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.” Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering.
The story above is one that we are very familiar with, but its not the fact that the woman got healed that I want to emphasize on, but the fact that she didn’t give up in the midst of her struggle. She had suffered for twelve years, tried and failed to get healing as she passed from one doctor to another. She had spent all she had in order to get well to no avail. Yet when she heard about Jesus she decided to give it another try. Had she dwelt on the failures of past attempts, she will never have tried Jesus and never had gotten freed from her suffering. She put her faith to work once more time and because this time in was the faith on Jesus and not the doctors, she was healed.
Whatever it is you are hoping in God for, as long as you remain a true child of God, hold on to the truth that God has the power to do what He has promised. He will not promise what He does not intend to give. As long as you have the promise of God, know for sure that at the appointed time, your smiles will come and your joy will be full. You are not built by God to break, your challenges are only there to make you strong. Don't loss your focus on Jesus. Learn to say like the woman with the issue of blood that “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed,” and in truth your faith will work for you to the glory of God alone.

You can get copies of my books in print and kindle format on amazon website via the provided links. I assure you of a refreshing knowledge of God's word as you get copies for yourself and loved ones. I am excited to inform you that for any of the under-listed books you buy on amazon website you get a free kindle copy of the same book, so hurry and get both the print copy and kindle copy just at the price of one.

Wednesday 23 April 2014

Marriage Lessons: My Experience

My last post was written on the 7th of April just a few hours before I was delivered of a wonderful son whom I gave birth to at the very early hours of the 8th day of this month. So I want to thank God for helping me through my months of pregnancy and the delivery of my forth child at the wonderful age of 40years. It can be none other than God who has sustained me all through these days.
In my last post I wrote about the story of a 40year old marriage that is less than perfect and I wanted my readers to learn from. One of the responses I got misunderstood the purpose of the post and thus concluded that I was judgmental in my write-up. I have since responded to that response, but will want write a little more of my own personal experience and the wisdom of God with which I have been managing my home and able to get relative peace in my marital life. This story is very recent and it's about me, my very own personal experience and I pray that someone reading this post will learn from and take advantage of it as they work at having a peaceful marital life with the grace of God alone.
Like I said earlier I just had my forth child barely 2weeks ago, and the delivery was through a caesarian operation. I was in the hospital for about 4days after the birth for monitoring and then allowed to go home. There is the stress of carrying a pregnancy and then the stress of delivery, and the added stress of having the baby through an operation which requires time for the wounds to heal and the pains to go away. In the middle of this, it is expected that the mother and child are allowed enough rest time to recover. Post-natal depression can be a serious issue if not well handled.
But in the middle of all these my husband found it convenient or maybe appropriate to pick a fight with me. He started getting edgy and nagging over every little and unnecessary thing the moment I got back from the hospital. I tried to manage the situation for a couple of days. It was so bad that when I serve him food, he’ll refuse to eat and then I’ll have to cook another food for him no matter how late in the night it was. Yet I was carrying on with the pains of the operation and the fact that I had to take care of a new baby in addition to attending to the needs of the other three.
Initially I was getting really pissed off by my husband’s attitude. He still expects that I’ll carry on with the usual house chores with the body pains that I had to bear with and the added responsibility of a new baby without any helping hand from him and he still feels justified to complain. I was growing very angry and withdrawn from him by each passing hour. I thought to pray, but was getting too angry with his selfish attitude than to even bother to pray.
At some point I decided to confront him. In cases like this I’ll rather send him a message on his phone rather than discuss with him in person to avoid an argument knowing fully well that I was getting edgy myself. He responded to my message that he is angry because I am not taking care of his needs anymore. That got me more pissed because I wondered if this man who is meant to be my husband understands my health condition. So I wrote him a message and asked who then takes care of my own needs and that of our four children if all I am supposed to be worrying about is meeting his needs at this very stage.
At this point I found a little strength in me to pray. So I asked God in the shortest possible words of prayer to help me through the situation and visit my marriage with His love. Then just from the blues I remembered the doctor had advised I take paracetamol tablets every six hours to help me through with the post delivery pains. So I began to take the medication. Although I was still very angry with my husband, but I started finding the strength to carry on my usual role in the house. I was able to wake up in time to make him a sandwich and a cup of tea before he left for work, I was able to help organize his wardrobe that had been disarranged, and then drive to drop his cloths at the laundry.
Within the next two days he noticed the change and start to care more. He apologized for been hard on me and for the first time in about 10days that I had put to bed, he demanded to see my stitches and find out how I was healing. It wasn’t that my husband was such a bad husband, he had paid more N400,000 in hospital bill for me to get the best medical care, he was always there to meet the financial demands as they arise. But the devil is at the watch waiting to cash in on any available opportunity to disintegrate the unity and peace of the home.
If I had not put a check on my emotions and remained obedient to my edgy husband even when I was very pissed with him, I will not be able to write this post to you today. If I had remained adamant on not attending to his needs owing to the fact that I needed attention and bed-rest myself, my marriage will be taking a gradual sleep to a break up and I will feel justified for my actions. But I bless God that I prayed. I bless God that He came through for me. I bless God that my marriage will forever be victorious over the schemes and devices of satan.
Sometimes we might feel we have the legitimate right to be angry. But the Lord has given us power over our emotions. 2 Timothy 1:7 says “For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.” Against your justification for anger is the spirit of power, love and self-discipline that God has given you. Use what the Lord has deposited in your life to conquer that which the devil opens your heart to as right.

Monday 7 April 2014

A Marriage Of 40years

Although so much as been said and written about the institution of marriage, but the need to continue to speak on this issue until the will and purpose of God is fulfilled in our homes cannot be overlooked. So in my post today I will again write just a little on the subject of marriage and pray that the Lord will minister to a home through this post today.
I happen to know a old couple, the husband being in his early 70s while the wife is in her mid 60s. They have been married for a little over 40yrs and their marriage has been in every way and manner less than an ideal marriage with the joy of marriage not being felt in their home. The husband happens to be a very high handed man, the likes of Nabal in the book of 1 Samuel 25, while the wife is gentle and accommodating. But as the years roll by and the wife not seeing any likely change in her husband's attitude towards her but instead of the man growing more matured, as he is growing older he is becoming more of a terror to the wife than a true husband. And this is how they have both lived for the over 40yrs that they have been together.
Just recently a quarrel broke out between these two old but estranged couple and I happen to hear about it, so I prayed. I sought the face of the Lord over the unending marital troubles of this couple. The strange truth is that the wife is a God fearing Christian and this has been the major reason why she has never contemplated a divorce from her trouble marriage or a separation from her unloving husband. But the fact that she is a God fearing Christian ought to be more of the reason why she should have things going well for her in her marriage. So like I said earlier, I decided to pray for these couple and seek the face of God for the solution to the travails of their marriage.
As I prayed the Lord revealed to me that in as much as the wife is suffering so much in her marriage as it is, she has not done enough to be a help to that unloving husband of hers as God has assigned her to be. The Christ in her is not shining bright enough to bring the husband out of the den of his bad behaviour to the position of a faithful and good husband. And although she prays well enough for her husband, yet her prayers have not been accompanied by the ideal behaviour of a wife to a husband. And this will not make for the desired result as the Lord will answer her prayers through the good deeds in her life towards her husband.
I was not really shocked by the revelation God gave me. This wife of over 40yrs has been so badly treated by her husband for so many years that it is pretty difficult to forgive or see anything good in the man. Although she remains married to him for the sake of honouring God, and not wanting the stigma of separation after many years, but speaking about having any feeling of love for the man she married to is non-existent. Now that she is old and the attributes of old age are setting in for her, she gets more irritated and confrontational with her husband, as she has harboured so much resentment towards him over the years.
In all of this narration what I want those reading this post to take home as a lesson is this: In all our service to God, our assignment in the home is of utmost importance. And despite all that your spouse has done wrong to you, your God given assignment to be his suitable help has not changed. Also as a husband, no matter how bad your wife has hurt your feelings, your God given assignment to love her unconditionally has not changed. His/her attitude towards you has in no way excused you from fulfilling your God given assignment to him or her because it is a God given assignment and not man assigned.
Another important point to hold on to is that your prayer with regards to your spouse’s change of attitude will be of little effect if you do not accompany it will good attitude. 1 Peter 3:1-6 teaches the wives that it is by their behaviour that their unbelieving husbands are won over to God. This takes place when the husband sees the purity and reverence in the life of his wife and not just endless prayers. Also 1 Peter 3:7 teaches that the husband who does not treat his wife with love and respect stands the risk of having his prayers hindered. So we need to be mindful of our attitude as we work towards getting a peaceful home and fulfilling our God given assignment.
The story of the 40yr old marriage in crisis is only so because the couple have not accompanied their prayers with the prescribed attitude of marriage towards each other. The wife is still holding on to the hurt of the maltreatment of her husband and so finds it hard to submit to him as required of her even though she is praying for him. And the husband is still so engrossed in being the boss to his wife and sees no point in loving or showing her respect. Yet these two live in misery of marriage and it has been so for over 40yrs.
In conclusion I will say this, our ego or the will to hold on to the hurting feeling from the attitude of our spouses possess one big danger. There is no matter how much we have worked for God, we stand the risk of losing our eternity over this issue. If we have been unable to fulfill this assignment of marriage given to us by God then all our works of righteousness holds for nothing. May the Lord help us to be faithful in all things.

Wednesday 19 March 2014

The Husband and His Marriage

In my last post, I was able to write a little on the role of a wife in marriage and I got quite some interesting responses to that post. In that post, I had addressed just the women, noting that I am a woman and I am inclined to discuss issues from a woman’s perspective. But that has not left out the fact that a man has a very big role to play in marriage. And so with all humility and respect for the men as the head over the women, I will write today on what God expects of a man in marriage and how the man can probably bring out the best in his wife.
I am convinced basically from what I have read in the Bible that the foundation of the home is the responsibility of the woman, but that does not put off the truth that God expects the man to have some input in the building of a success home. The fact that the man is the head of the home makes him accountable for most of the issues of the home. His contributions are not limited to providing for the family because even the woman has also been saddled with the responsibility to provide for the family as we can see in Proverbs 31. So in order to understand well what God expects of the man in marriage we need to go back to the Bible.

Ephesians 5:25-31 (NIV)
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no-one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ the church - for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”

Colossians 3:19 (NIV)
Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.

1 Peter 3:7 (NIV)
Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

Just as I did when I discussed on the roles of the wife, I have gone back to passages in the Bible where God explicitly gave His instruction to the husband through Paul and Peter. The instruction for the husbands is first of all to love their wives just as Christ loved the church. If God had just told the husband to love his wife, it could be any kind of love, it could be half love or a quarter love, but God said the love of the husband to his wife should be in the pattern in which Christ loved the church. So any love short of this kind of love from the husband to his wife is not what God expects from a man to his wife.
The kind of love God expects from the husband to the wife is such that the husband should be ready to give himself up for his wife, it is a kind of love that unconditional. Just as the church has betrayed the trust of Christ so many times and yet He loves them, God expects that the husband should love his wife despite her shortfall.
Now speaking of shortfalls in the life of the wife, the book of Ephesians 3 tells us that Christ made the church holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word and then presented her to himself as a radiant church without stain, wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. If the church was holy without Christ, there will be no need for Christ to make her holy because she would have been perfect as she was.
But due the imperfection of the church Christ had to put in efforts in making the church (His bride) holy and blameless, by the washing with the water through the word. And He did this just that He might present the church to HIMSELF as a radiant church. Christ didn’t take the pains to cleanse the church for any other person or purpose, but for His own personal pleasure.
This is the pattern that God has set before the man as the approved pattern for the husband in marriage. He has been mandated by God to love his wife unconditionally and then just like Christ did, make efforts at cleansing her and making her holy and blameless, then presenting her to himself and nobody else as a radiant bride. This the husband will do not for the pleasure of anyone else, but for himself alone. As a man, the unconditional love that you have been mandated by God to have for your wife is to propel you to bring out the radiance in her. Working to remove the shortfalls in her life that you might enjoy to the full advantage what God has deposited in the life of your wife for you.
God through Paul also instructed that the man is to love his wife as himself. He says the fact that you love your wife is an indication that you love yourself, and in as much as you cannot hate yourself, you ought not to hate your wife.
This sometimes look like not the case with many men and it appears very possible to love themselves yet not love their wives. But in order to understand this a little better I will want us to look at two more Bible passages.

Genesis 2:18 (NIV)
The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

Proverbs 18:22 (NIV)
He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favour from God.

When Paul said the man who loves his wife loves himself, he was not speaking out of context. If God who made man in the beginning has declared that it is not good for the man to be alone, then that goes to tell us there is a missing link in the existence of man that only his wife who is the suitable help the Lord has made for him can fill. So to say that the existence of the man is not perfectly complete without the wife who is his suitable help. Nobody but God made it so.
The problem with the man who does not love his wife is that he has despised that which the Lord has provided for him to make him complete and perfect. The wife is not just an ordinary entity to the man, she is not just like any other person who appears in his life, she is a portion of him that the Lord placed in his life to complete and make perfect his existence. And so Paul says you as a man cannot claim to love yourself when you don't love your wife. And this is so true because your wife is part of you.
Just as I asked in my last blog post to the women, before you write your wife off as a thorn in your flesh, in what way have you attempted to cleanse her, thereby presenting her to yourself as a radiant bride in the same pattern as Christ did the church? Before you approach the divorce court to annul that marriage, what can you say has been your input in the life of your wife to make her a better person for your own pleasure? What are the good seeds that you have planted in the life of your wife that you have prayerfully watered and nurtured from which you expect the harvest of goodness from her life? If you have not been able to do the needful in the life of your wife, then you will be just as guilty when you proclaim that she has not been the wife you expect her to be. May the Lord help the husbands to be all that He expects them to be.

You can get copies of my books in print and kindle format on amazon website via the provided links. I assure you of a refreshing knowledge of God's word as you get copies for yourself and loved ones. I am excited to inform you that for any of the under-listed books you buy on amazon website you get a free kindle copy of the same book, so hurry and get both the print copy and kindle copy just at the price of one.