By common knowledge, the first thing that comes to mind when we speak of helpers is that they support, they mostly are the backend support that makes things happen. When you speak of a helper you don't first think of such as a leader. But moving from common knowledge, by virtue of God's arrangement in marriage, the husband leads and the wives follow. But she just doesn't follow blindly, she supports and helps.
Going back to common knowledge, a leader gives instructions and the followers obey the same. Based on God's principles in marriage, the husband leads, and the wives submit. The dictionary meaning of the word submission means to willingly yield yourself to the authority of another. So as a wife what God expects of you as found in Ephesians 5:22-24 is that you willing yield yourself to the authority of your husband just as in the manner in which you willingly yield yourself to the authority of God. A deviation from this pattern is a road path to chaos in marriage.
That was what happened when Eve decided to leave the path of following the lead of her husband. But before you go negative on me, just follow me closely. I very well understand that the husband makes mistakes and some husbands seem unworthy to be followed. I am a wife and I am no angel so I feel like every other wife feels and I have experiences too that are not perfect or near perfect. And many years ago I thought just like you might now that my husband was unworthy to be followed. And I began to pray. I knew God's word wouldn't change and if I want peace in my marriage I must obey that word of God that says I must submit to my husband as unto the Lord. So I prayed that God will fill my husband up with Himself such that the words of my husband will come in the form of instructions and will be God's words and instructions for me. And with confidence that what I have prayed for God will answer, I learned to submit to my husband even in the silliest things and it has really paid off because it has fetched me peace of mind in my marriage and helped me build the bond of unity in my marriage.
I will share a story of my personal experience on the issue of submission. About 20months ago I began a business and my husband got me a shop to sell lace fabrics. He renovated the shop and did it so tastefully. I had assumed that with much beauty built into the shop he will give me a good sum of money to stock up the shop. But to my disappointment, he gave me so little that it was about a fraction of what he used in renovating the shop that he gave me to buy goods in the shop to sell. In fact what I got from him then couldn't even fill a shelf. I was pained but I remembered that notwithstanding I was still supposed to submit to him as my husband. And submit I did.
But rather than getting hurt, I began to think and pray on how to kick start the business and grow it with the very little I had. To the glory of God, ideas started pouring into my head and I began to implement them. Then I learned to use social media to boost my sales and the sales I made using social media far outweighed what I ever thought of selling in the shop.
Now the lesson there for me was that if indeed I had gotten the big money I wanted from my husband and stocked the shop with so many goods, the poor sales would have frustrated my business and I would have been perceived as a failure. But because he didn't give me what I wanted and I submitted to him irrespective, I was able to challenge myself, think outside the box and pray and launched my business beyond what I would have been able to do given that I had all the money I wanted. God used my husband to teach me and I am happy I didn't resist the lesson.
If Eve had just stayed within the limits of following her husband, the serpent would not have had a hold on her. When you feel your husband isn't making sense then turn to God in prayer but never leave the covering of God's commandment for your life, never move off the position of submission to your husband as the Lord has ordained and ordered you to as a wife. Prayer without deed is dead and so prayer without submission is dead and also submission without prayer is powerless.