Even After Forty-Five Years God is Still Healing This Marriage

I welcome you to a new week and new grace and blessing from the Lord for us all this week in Jesus name. Today I want to share a very funny but true story. And each time I consider this story I just marvel at God awesomeness. I can tell you for free that the wisdom of God is matchless.

There are these couples where the husband is in his mid-seventies and the wife in her late sixties. They have been married for well over forty-five years and their marriage has been plagued with so many challenges and issues but despite it all, they are still managing to hold it together. And though neither of them is enjoying the dividend of a good marriage they are still managing to keep it together as married enemies. The husband has absolutely no regard for his wife, in fact I should say wives because he is married to two of them. But the one he is living with is his first and the God ordained wife for him.

The wife was a gentle spirited being as a young woman and wife and she tolerated and stomached all of her husband’s excesses. She wasn’t loved yet she managed to stay in the marriage any way. And because she was not loved, she was also not treated fairly among the two wives and still she remained. Soon she gave her life to Christ but it wasn’t easy just forgetting all that her husband had done to her more so that he was not repentant.

As she grew in age, so did the resentment she had for her husband grow. The one person she regarded as enemy in her life was her husband, and as much as she wanted to give it all up to God, she just can’t seem to get past all that her husband had done and is stilling doing to her. And for her, divorce was not an option. She would always say that she prays her husband would not be the reason for her to end up in hell after all her service to God. She was not going to harm him in anyway, but it was tough forgiving and letting go of the hatred more so that the husband had not changed his wicked ways. Each time she makes up her mind to let go, the husband would do something that will upset her again and bring back all the stored up anger. And let me not forget to say that her husband physical abuses her. He beats her up like a child. And so in that situation I am sure it’s easy to understand why this wife is bitter about her husband.

But because of God she began to pray. She asked God to help her through her hate for her husband as she didn’t want to carry the hatred to her grave and the more she made an effort at forgiving, the more the husband does something that upsets her.

Then one day the husband fell sick and was admitted in the hospital. The wife took it upon herself to take care of him as much as she could. And then one of the relatives who came to visit the husband on his sick bed confided in the wife that she had gone to check the family history and made ancestral findings in the husband’s family line and discovered that the husband’s family had the history of unnoticed mental disorder in their lineage and that explains the irrational behaviors experienced in the lives of some members of their family including the husband who was in his mid-seventies. She gave examples of members of the extended family who exhibited traits of mental disorder and sometimes acted weird and all these story sounded so true to this troubled wife in her late sixties as she noticed that traits and symptoms mentioned to her were things she had noticed in her husband in their forty-five years of marriage.

She began to think that in the over forty-five years she had been married to her husband he had mental disorder and she didn’t even suspect. To her, it explained a lot of her husband's unexplainable irrational behaviors and for the first time she had the load of hatred lifted off her. She took comfort in the fact that whenever her husband acted unloving or harsh towards her for no reason then it would be the times when he had bouts of his mental disorder triggers. So rather than get angry or upset, she would willingly forgive him thinking he doesn’t even know what he is doing. When he shouts at her, she doesn’t respond and nothing he does gets to her anymore.

Now, whether this man and his family line truly does have history of mental disorder or not, nobody knows for sure. But that theory has given the wife a reason to truly forgive her husband and heal old wounds. It has also helped their relationship, because now the wife doesn’t react to her husband’s harshness anymore and because the wife has stopped reacting to her husband’s tantrums, the husband himself is downplaying on the frequency of his harshness towards his wife. Now when he talks harshly, he doesn’t get a response and so he is learning to talk politely to his wife. The wife's prayer and tender approach towards her harsh and mean husband is causing a positive reaction from the husband too. I sense these two will enjoy the best of their marriage is the very later stage of their lives.

So you see why I said the wisdom of God is matchless. See what God had to do to heal a marriage that has been plagued with lack of love and hatred for over forty-five years. I hope you have learnt something new and interesting from this.  

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