Building Trust In Marriage.

Jeremiah 17: 5-10

This is what the Lord says:

“Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for his strength and whose heart turns away from the Lord. He will be like a bush in the wastelands; he will not see prosperity when it comes. He will dwell in the parched places of the desert, in a salt land where no-one lives.

“But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.”

The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?

“The Lord searches the heart and examines the mind, to reward a man according to his conduct, according to what his deeds deserve.” 

One of the major bottlenecks faced by married couples is the issue of trust. There are quite a number of areas in a marriage where trust has been regarded to play a major role. We have the issue of trust in the financial life of married couples, trust in the sexual life of married couples, trust in the work life of married couples and trust in the way couples handle external relationships. So there are many parts of the marriage life that the issue of trust features prominently. 

Lack of trust in any of these areas of marital life that is mentioned and even those not mentioned have contributed greatly to the high divorce rate the world over. Without being told it is expected that a man is faithful on all grounds to the woman he has married and a woman is faithful to the man she is married to. It’s the requirement and it’s what God demands of a spouse to his/her partner. But nonetheless faithfulness which in turns earns trust is an attribute that we fail in every now and then. Some spouses are able to conceal their unfaithfulness from their partners more than others, but with time we all get to know that there is nothing hidden under the sun. 

The knowledge of this unfaithfulness leads to a lot of disasters in marriage, some even kill for it. The sense of betrayal that follows can be overwhelming and it takes great effort to build the lost trust again if ever that is possible.

But the mistake we make as humans whether married or not, whether in a relationship or not is that we tend to invest our trust in the man whom we cannot ascertain the state of their heart. What we are exposed to in the other person we see and love is the aspect of him/her that he/she reveals to us. We are able to judge based on what we see and not actually what is concealed in the heart. The Lord said “Cursed is the man who trusts in man.” I am positive this is a big pill to swallow, but to invest our total trust in a man is to take a big risk, a very big risk I must say. This is so because this man that we have so trusted is liable to fall at any time. He is prone to temptations and can make mistakes at any time and can fall at any time no matter his level of righteousness. This is so because he is just a man. 

This man will not fall into temptation because he wants to, he will not fall because he wants to hurt you, the fall might not be an intentional one, but still he might fall, and his falling will hurt you, break your heart, and injure your trust or might even destroy the trust completely. This can happen not just in marriage issues, but in any and every form of relationship. It could be between loved siblings or between the children and their parents or even between close friends. But the truth is that the trust of a man by a man is a big risk that we take. 

Now, paying more attention to the man and wife in marriage, the question that follows this discovery is that how is it possible for the man and wife to live in love and harmony without trusting each other? When we are able to answer this question well enough then we understand how to handle the matter of trust in marriages and even in every aspect of our lives where trust is required. 

Again I will use a true life story and the experience of a wife regarding the issue of trust to give an illustration to how God wants us to deal with trust in our lives. There is a lady with so many issues in her marriage and one of the issues that affected her marriage so deeply was infidelity. And this went on over some time. It was an issue that cut through her heart and each time her husband promised to make adjustment she discovered it was just a little better of cover up. As would be expected this really got her weighed down as it went on for a number of years. Naturally it affected her ability to trust her husband and it affected their marriage deeply. 

Gradually the husband began to make changes and paid more attention to her and their children but that still didn’t make him earn her trust him because he had made several promises and failed to keep them. But then she began to pray, she asked God to come into the situation and help her.  I didn’t want my marriage to break, but she could not trust my husband anymore. She cried to God and prayed on that issue over a period of time. Then in the middle of her prayer with tears and swollen eyes she heard the Lord speak to her heart that He will visit her marriage once again and put a stop to infidelity in her home. The Lord asked her to trust Him on that. She was then reminded of Sarah and Abimelech. So she decided to trust God on that. 

Infidelity in her home has found its permanent exit. She didn’t have to trust her husband not to cheat on her again, even though he appeared a totally changed man that she can see and is evident in his attitude in their home, but she trusts God to prevent infidelity from happening again in my home. She is very comfortable to commit herself to her husband and marriage not because she has his words of never cheating on her again, but because she has a word from God not to make that happen in my home again. Her husband can always break his words, but her God will never break His promise. 

This is not applicable to just married couples, but also in all other forms of relationships we might find ourselves. It’s easier to trust, when you are not trusting man but God. Whatever changes you want to occur in your spouse, pray and trust God to effect those changes in him/her rather than to believe that he/she will be all that you expect them to be by themselves. It’s even more reliable to trust God than man. When all your trust is invested in God then your life will flourish and your mind will be at peace because God will never break His promise or betray your trust in Him. He remains ever faithful. 

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Who Is Your Wife To You?

Genesis 2:18-23

The Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." 

Now the Lord God had formed out of the ground all the beast of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. 

But for Adam no suitable help was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

The man said.

"This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman', for she was taken out of the man."

Ephesian 5:25-30

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any blemish, but holy and blameless. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no-one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church - for we are members of his body.  

We celebrated father's day today in my church. I guess the church postponed the celebration for some reasons, but it was fun. There was so much emotion in the air and the fathers who have done so well in handling the responsibilities that the Lord has laid on their lives over their families could not help but feel proud and loved with all the accolades, appreciations and loves messages pouring out of their loved ones to them. My husband was not left out too, couldn't get him a gift though, and for us everyday is father's day. With what the Lord is doing in my home I get to celebrate my husband all the time.

But then there is still a little need to address the husbands in marriage issues. In as much as the Lord has commanded that the woman to build her home, we cannot totally blame the woman for a faulty marriage. When a man understands the important role his wife has been placed in his life to perform and accomplish, then it is easy for him to appreciate his wife for what she has been placed in his life to be and do and this in turn gives the wife the boost and encouragement to give her best in serving her husband and her own role as a home builder is greatly simplified. 

I will humbly seek the permission of the men to address them in this blog post and I believe they will lend me their attention. I do not stand to instruct any man, but plead with their conscience through the word of God. 

Going by the word of God in Genesis 2:18, it says "The Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.'"It was not any man who pronounced man as unfit or better still not ideal to be alone, but God. The Lord who created man at the beginning said it is not good, not proper, but befitting, not suitable, not ideal, not appropriate that man should be alone. If man didn't need a help, support, assistance, the Lord will not declare it so. He created the man, He know what the man is made up of, He understands the strength and weakness of the man and thus declared that man needs a help.

The second thing that I observed and want us to see in the Genesis 2 passage is that among all that God created, among the beast of the ground, the birds of the air and the fish in the sea, the Lord did not find one suitable to help the man. None of all that God created was good enough to help man overcome the loneliness that God observed in the life of the man. So the Lord made the man fall into a deep sleep and from within  him God took a part and created the woman. The suitable help for the man has to be one brought forth from within the man himself. 

God in His infinite wisdom knows that the help that can adequately fit in to suitably help the man and fill the vacuum of loneliness in the man He has created has to be one brought out of him and created in like manner as him. Not the birds of the air, or the fish in the sea, or the beast of the ground but one brought out of the man. 

Then moving forward, we will also see in that passage that the woman God made is a suitable help for the husband. What that tells me is that in every way a man may need help in life, God has placed the woman ahead into the man's life to be that ideal help. No wonder Proverbs 18:22 say "he who finds a wife has found a good thing and obtains favour from God." 

So some things that men need to note about their wives is that she is the unequaled help created by God from them and for them to help fulfill there destiny, fill every vacuum in their lives and help birth the favour of God in their lives. When a man has the divine revelation of who his wife is and the role she has been placed in his life by God to perform, then it will not be so much of a problem for him to love and treat with care this beautiful addition that God has given to him. 

In the mood of father's day celebration it will be nice to really appreciate what God expects of His man towards his wife. Paul said in the book of Ephesians that just in the same manner that Christ Jesus loved and gave himself up for the church is what God expects of the man towards his wife. 

Paul said Christ Jesus loved the church well enough to give himself up for her in order to make her holy. He cleansed her through the washing of water by the word and presents her to himself as a radiant church, without stain, wrinkle or blemish but holy and blameless. This is what Christ had to do to the church that He present to Himself.

In like manner the Lord God wants the man to cleansed his wife with the word and with love, so that he can present her to himself (and not another but himself) as one without blemish, wrinkle or stain. Your effort in making your wife the ideal help is not that another person might take advantage of what you are doing, but that whatever you do, you do yourself because your wife is to be presented by you and to you and not another. Your labour in making her a beautiful piece to behold is such that you alone will enjoy the result of what you have deposited in her. 

Then Paul also noted that the husband ought to love their wives as their own bodies. The words of Paul cannot be more true because in truth going by the words of God in Genesis 2:18-23, the wife is taken from her husband. She is flesh of flesh with you and bone of bones with, she is your better half, your missing rib, she is you in another form. So the Lord expects that the manner in which you take care of the You body is the same way you take care of the Her body. So you are responsible for taking care of two bodies that are you in different forms. 

It does not matter that she is from another family of another clan of another tribe of another state and another country. The Lord who made the You and the Her says He made the Her body from the You body and that cannot be contested or proven otherwise. He made you and form her from you, and at the time set by Him, He present her to you to become your wife and suitable help. What an awesome God He is. 

As a man there is the need to pray that God opens your heart to understand the position of your wife in your life and how to take advantage of the placement of this suitable help in your life. There is none like your wife, no help suitable enough for your life than your wife. You will be maximizing her gift in your life when you learn to love and care for her like yourself. She alone fits because she was taken from you.

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You Are Important In God's Agenda

Matthew 5:13-16

"You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt looses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men. 

"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.

I am not sure a lot of people understand the weight of what Jesus was saying in this passage above, and I am also not sure we understand the responsibilities and that accompanies who the Lord says we are according to the passage above. Jesus said we are the salt of the world. Without salt in any food, it is tasteless, not pleasant and enjoyable for the taste boards. So salt is something that is suppose to add a pleasant taste to food. It's an ingredient that cannot be avoided in the kitchen. It is essential to cooking and food making as all will agree with me. 

From my own understanding of what Jesus is talking about in the passage above, we who are children of God and have been called the salt of the earth are essential ingredients in the existence of the earth. We are the beings that cannot be avoided on the earth with a primary mission to add a pleasant feel to the earth. We have been created and put on the earth to add flavour to the earth. We have been created by God and put on the earth to add goodiness to the earth and make it good for living. 

So it is not far fetch to conclude that in order for Jesus to call us the salt of the earth there most be something that the Lord has placed inside of us designed to add flavour and colour to the earth. There is something is our composition that God placed in us to make the earth better, pleasant, conducive, interesting, peaceful and habitable.

Again Jesus says we are the light of the world, we are a city on a hill that cannot be hidden. That tells me that we possess a glow about us that it meant to light the world around us. There is a sparkling light in our lives that shines forth in the glory of God that is meant to accrue praise for our Father in heaven and give light to those around us.

Two important question that follows this passage are: 1) Are you aware that you are the salt of the earth and the light of the world? 2) Are you enhancing the taste of the earth with your saltiness and is your glow bright enough to give light to everyone in the house?

Jesus closed this passage by saying that it is through your good deeds that men see and praise your Father in heaven for that you shine your light and salt the earth. You were not created just to exist, your were created to salt the earth and light the world. Your presence on the earth is important to God, if not you will not be here in the first instance. Your good deeds and righteousness is of value to God and man. If men don't sing your praise and acknowledge your good deeds, make sure God is acknowledging your good works on earth. It is far more than a million praise that man can offer. When God has acknowledged you well, man has no choice but to follow up in the pattern of the Lord. 

That Big Word Called Forgive

Matthew 6:12-14

Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.

For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Matthew 5:43-48

"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbour and hate your enemy.' But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his son to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

I will once again want to apologize for the intermittent breaks in my post, it due to the work done in trying to make my books meet up with Amazon requirements. I do really apologize and pray the Lord will help me balance my time. 

When I was trusting God to give me a word for today's post, what the Holy Spirit dropped in my spirit is the topic of forgiveness. In the passages above we will realize that as a child of God forgiveness is an issue that cannot be swept under the carpet. As a matter of fact one of the measure used in ascertaining your eligibility as a child of God is your ability to forgive and love not just those who love you, but also those who hate you.

I try to imagine a world filled with forgiveness, a world where no one holds a grudge against another, and I see heaven on earth. In that place where the throne of God is situated, there are no holding grudges, and there are no malice, and there is no hatred. It is a place of love, peace and abundance of forgiveness. 

In trying to cultivate heavenly traits here on earth, it is important to appreciate that in truth it is not as easy to forgive. When someone has offended you and is seeking forgiveness and is in fact remorseful and repentant, by human standard its understandable to forgive such. At that point forgiveness really would not take much effort.

But when the person you are required to forgive is someone who is not remorseful or repentant, and given the chance, will inflict as much pain on you as he/she has done before, and just to cut the story short, this person is in fact a known enemy, then to forgive such a person will be difficult. At this point, you will require grace and abundant grace from God to forgive such and have to keep forgiving such at the expense of your pains. But this is the forgiveness that Jesus speaks about in the passages above. Not the easy kind of forgiveness, but the tough one. The forgiveness that separates you from others. The forgiveness that comes with a reward because it actually requires an effort of grace to accomplish.The forgiveness that draws you closer to perfection just as your Father in heaven is perfect. That is the forgiveness that Jesus speaks about. 

The next thing that will come to mind is that in our walk with God, how can we get to the point where we can forgive those who hate us. Where like Stephen and our Lord Jesus Christ we can truthfully with a pure heart pray for those who persecute us. When I was faced with the need to forgive someone whom I know was my enemy and she didn't hide it, the first thing I did was to pray. I had to pray about the matter over a period of time because it truth forgiveness in the face of persecution really does require the grace of God.

One other thing that you need to understand is that God who is your Father is the Big Judge of all. He loves you too much to allow anyone inflict pains on you unjustly, so you need to understand that He will fight your course. He will avenge for you while you hold your peace. But in my own trying time the Holy Spirit gave me an illustration that really helped me through the issue of forgiveness and that I will like to share. 

Let's assume there are two people in conflict, one on the right side of the matter and the other one is the unjust bully. The person on the right side of the issue is really a quite easy going person, though she was continually being hurt by this unjust bully, she always makes effort to forgive and move on. She was always reporting all the hurt inflicted on her by the unjust bully to her father who in turn encourages her to forgive and move on. She never retaliated or paid back evil for evil. Her only consolation lies in the strength of her father's encouraging words. On the other hand, the unjust bully always sees the gentleness of his prey as a reason to go on bullying. It was easy for him to bully due to lack of confrontation or a fight-back. 

This went on until there was a need for the two to drag themselves to court. On appearing in court it was discovered that the father of the gentle prey who is the one on the right side of the issue is the presiding judge to handle the case. I am sure you will all agree with me that the case had ended even before it started. 

This illustration is just the case when we forgive. Our Father in heaven is the Judge of all and He says vengeance is His. He will handle the matter accordingly. Now we need to note that if the gentle prey had attempted to fight back she would have contaminated the case. She also would have been on the erring side no matter how little. But she was vindicated for her silence and forgiveness. And that is what God expects of us .

Romans 12:17-21

Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge, I will repay," says the Lord. On the contrary:

If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." 

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. 

I suppose this passages sums up a lot on the issue of forgiveness. It is important that we the children of God do not get our hands soiled with sin as we seek vengeance. Let us leave the matter to God and let Him judge as appropriate, bearing in mind that the most high Judge of all is your heavenly Father. 

Forgiveness is a virtue that comes with its reward as we can read in the book of Matthew 5:43-38. Forgiveness is what shows the world that indeed we are children of the most high God. Forgiveness is the prerequisite condition that we must fulfill in order to have our sins forgiven by God. There is no justification we can have before God to hold a grudge against anyone, not even our enemies. As children of God we need to always pray for grace to live above the sin of unforgiveness and walk in perfect love just like our Father in heaven.

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The Suffering That Makes Perfect

Hebrews 12: 4-11

In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons:

"My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son."

Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. 

Roman 8:18-19

I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed. 

Is it possible to have a general in the military force who did not go through a form of rigorous training? At the entry level a lot of people get listed into the military force, but just a few attain the rank of a general. When you have a particular batch of soldiers and you compare the number of them in a year set at the entry level to the number of them in that same year set many years later who attain the rank of a generals you will probably come to a ratio of 1:3.

We need to try and imagine a military officer who didn't go through a military training before becoming an army general. On all fronts this is an impossible occurrence. In the world over those who are trained for war are about the most disciplined people because the training they have undergone produces discipline in them and ultimately prepares them for battle. One other thing that we need to be mindful of is that these set of people are accorded special respect, and indeed they deserve as much respect that they are accorded and much more because the training they have passed through to get to the point of honour is not attainable by just anybody. A lot will not attempt it, while a lot others have fallen along the way or withdrawn from the process. This training is not the easiest to engage in for any length of time. But for those who succeed, there awaits them the medal of honour.

The Bible has likened the various hardships, challenges and struggles that we might be facing as discipline and it is designed by God to produce a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. So what this tells us is that whatever challenge, struggle, trial or whatever name we might want to give it that we are facing, is to produce perfection in us if we allow ourselves to be trained by it. 

What really interests me in this passage is that the Lord recognizes that this hardships or struggles are actually painful, and so we are now aware that the Lord recognizes and understands our pains. And though He has the ability to take the pain away He lets it stay until we attain perfection. Because it will be a fruitless effort to go through the pains without achieving the desired result of perfection in us.

Paul said in Roman 8:18 that our present suffering is not worth comparing to the glory that will be revealed in us, and then went on to say that the creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God who have undergone the suffering, who have been trained by their struggles and are shinning forth in the glory of God to manifest. This is very much like the training and the honour of the army general described above. 

Romans 8:28-30

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he justified; those he justified, he also glorified. 

Hebrews 5:8-10

Although he was a Son, he learned obedience from what he suffered and, once made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him and was designated by God to be high priest in the order of Melchizedek.

These two passages really helped me pull throw in my own trying times. The revelation of the word that I got from these passages helped me to hold on and get the training for my life as the Lord will have me learn them. Paul said that those God foreknew He predestined to be conformed to the likeness of His Son Jesus Christ. And that tells me that there are some people that indeed the Lord has called and predestined to be conformed to be like Jesus. These category of people are also justified by God and then they are glorified. 

But when we read through the second passage in Hebrews, we will see that Jesus didn't attain that level of perfection by chance. The Bible tell us that He learned and was made perfect from the things He suffered. There was a process of some form of training through suffering that produced perfection in Jesus.

If then we are called to be conformed in likeness to the Lord Jesus Christ, it is important to realize that there is no short-cut to perfection outside the training we get from our suffering. Just like the suffering produced perfection in Christ and then He was glorified and designated by God to be high priest in the order of Melchizedek, so is our suffering suppose to be produce perfection in us in the likeness of Jesus that we might be joint-heirs with Him, if we allow ourselves to be trained by it. The sufferings are not designed to break us, but rather to make us perfect and glorify us in the end. Paul said the suffering, painful as they may be, is nothing compared to the glory that will revealed in us if only we endure the process. 

In my short life, I must confess I have passed through what appears like the valley of shadow of death. I might never have known the Lord like I do if not for the things that I have suffered. But the suffering painful as they were at that time helped me develop a relationship with God that I am enjoying now and also sharing with you. The sufferings have helped me to know sin as sin no matter how innocent they may appear and run away from such. The thought of never wanting to go back to those dark days of my life has glued me to the presence of God. And I have so remained in God's presence so that I now enjoy His presence. 

For whatever struggles you might be facing, there is a purpose for it being there and it will not last forever. The moment you allow the Lord use those challenges to get you to where He wants you to be, they will disappear and your life will be refreshed again. We learned in the books of Psalms that when the Lord returned the captives to Zion, they were like them that dream dreams. 

It is just as hurting to God as it is to you to allow you go through those challenges, remember He is your Father that loves you immeasurably, but in order that you might shine forth for the world to see, you need to go through the process and endure the process and attain perfection and receive the glory. You were not built by God to break.   

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Getting Satisfied In God

Psalm 37:4

Delight yourself in the Lord; and he will give you the desires of your heart. 

It's been almost 10 days since I last shared a post, being really busy with self publishing hurdles to cross and domestic pressures all in one. But as a vessel in the hands of the Lord, I believe in the middle of all these there is also a need to share the truth of the word of God to someone out there who surely needs it, and I bless God He found me worthy a vessel to use in reaching out.

In attempting to write this post I was a bit blank, not sure of what the Lord will have me share. I have shared so much on the issues of marriage that I am positive a lot of my readers will consider me as one focused on marriage matters alone. But it's important to write as the Lord directs. I am very encouraged though with the comments and responses I have received on my marriage posts. 

My post for today I believe will be focused on the word of God in Psalm 37:4 which says "Delight yourself in the Lord; and he will give you the desires of your heart." In order to really appreciate what this passage says, we need to understand very well what the word Delight means. From the dictionary, delight has the following meaning: 1) a feeling of great pleasure and satisfaction, 2) something that makes you feel very happy or satisfied. 

If we understand and agree that the above is the definition for the word delight, then we are a step closer to the realization of our heart's desires. What the Bible is telling us from the passage above is that if we dear make the Lord our source of great satisfaction and pleasure, then the Lord will in turn grant us the desires of our heart. 

To make the Lord the source of our great pleasure and satisfaction is to enjoy being His child, it is to enjoy being in His presence, it is to enjoy obeying His commands and instructions, it is to enjoy serving Him and doing His will at all times, it is to enjoy letting His light shine through us for the world to see. And when we have made these mentioned attributes our ultimate source of satisfaction and pleasure, then whatever it is we desire in our hearts the Bible says this wonderful God that we have so delighted in, will give them all to us.  

In Deuteronomy 7:9, the Lord professed His love and faithfulness to a thousand generation of those who love and keep His command. He didn’t just profess His love but says He will be faithful to those who love Him. So to say that He is and always will be committed to keeping all of His promises to those who love Him. In order words the Lord says that as long as you delight yourself in Him, He will grant you the desires of your Heart, then He is committed to keeping that promise to a thousandth of your generation. 

In whatever situation you may find yourself now, the Lord is still faithful in keeping His promise as long as you have made Him your source of satisfaction and pleasure. When your source of satisfaction and pleasure is in Christ Jesus, it is easy to loose focus of those heart breaking challenges, it is easy to loose focus of the sickness and pains the devil might want to burden you with, it is easy to loose focus of all your grieve no matter what that grieve may be.    

Once I was praying and trusting God for some very urgent needs in my life and family, and the Spirit of the Lord spoke to my heart saying I should not allow the seen impossibilities to take my focus away from the unseen possibilities. In truth we serve a God who brings about what is seen from what is unseen. 

When you are filled with very huge and beautiful dreams, when your heart longs for those beautiful things of life and they look impossible to reach, don't get weighed down, and never think your dreams are too huge to come to reality, just get busy getting satisfied by God. Get busy with making God the source of your great pleasure and delight. Get busy seeking and trusting God. How He materializes your dreams should be of little or no concern to you, He will do it anyway because He has promised He will and He is faithful and committed to all that He has promised.

Psalm 34:10 says "The lions may grow weak and hungry, but those who seek the Lord lacks no good thing." This I believe is the heritage of this who have made the Lord the source of the great pleasure and satisfaction.  

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You Are His Suitable Helper

Genesis 2:18

The Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."

Genesis 2:20b-22

But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 

In so many ways these two passages have made a lot of impact to me as a person, and to my conviction as a wife. And if only through the revelation of these passages women will understand their assignment in the lives of their husbands and perform such effectively, then the devil is permanently defeated in our homes and marriages. As an illustration to better understand the usefulness of these two passages to women, I will share a true life story that happened to a wife just like you and I.

A young Christian lady was having a chat with her friend and their discussion was based on marriage issues. One of these friends was married while the other was not. The single friend was of the pinion that marriage was a misery and sometimes God was unfair on that matter. The married lady who was a born-again Christian argued otherwise even though she was having troubles with her marriage as she just discovered that her husband was cheating on her.

The single lady gave the an instance of a born-again Christian lady who served the Lord with all her heart and then got married only to discover that her husband was gay and would not have sex with her. She explained that the lady has prayed well before making the decision to marry this guy and so if God was to be fair, why would He allow His faithful young daughter to marry a gay.

For a brief moment the Christian married friend was lost for words. She quickly said a word of prayer and asked the Holy Spirit to give her a word for this friend of hers who thought so negatively about marriage to the point that it was beginning to affect even her relationship with God so she needed to be careful in speaking to her. Meanwhile she also had her marital struggles. This question came up in the middle of a sickening marital challenge that she had. Just a day before that she discovered that her husband was having extra-marital affairs and though she had been suspecting so, but the confirmation of it really got her off balance. So she had this huge issue to tackle for her friend while having a huge issue on her mind also.

But as mentioned earlier, she prayed one of the shortest and most quiet prayer anyone could possibly pray. It had to be fast because she needed to respond to the person staring her at the face. And just then the Lord spoke to her heart; He said "What is the wife to the husband?" Is she not a suitable help? Did He (the Lord) give the woman any specific area of the man's life where she is to help? A wife is a suitable helper to her husband and it means in every area of the husband's life where he needs help, the wife is to come in and help. If the man has no issues in his life that he is struggling with, the Lord will not make for him a suitable helper. 

Just as the Lord was dropping the words in her spirit, she spoke them to her friend. And she told her that this lady in question is in luck because she is discovering where the issue is in the life of her husband and where her role is required in his life. She is the God ordained helper for that gay husband of hers and so she needs to start praying, she needs to start trusting God on behalf of her husband to break the yoke and evil lust of homosexuality in his life and she should faithfully do so without rest until she sees result.  

Surprisingly, this divine revelation healed her heart-brokenness more than it answered her friend's question. It was with this revelation that the Lord opened her heart to the role she needed to play is helping her husband overcome adultery more than the hurt she was feeling over the fact that he was cheating on her. She realized the need to help him more than the pain of betrayal that had overwhelmed her initially and so she began to pray. Her husband didn't understand why the sudden calmness over the quarrels they had been dealing with on trust issues, but he was at least glad he was forgiven. But there and then through the revelation of the importance and necessity of the role of a wife as a helpmeet in her husband's life, this wife was able to stand in the gap and pray for her husband; that the Lord will forgive him of his sins and renew his life. She also prayed against every intruder that was attempting to destabilize the peace of her home. She prayed her heart out until she began to see results. With time her marriage was at peace and she praised God for it. Soon her husband became her best friend and she loved him even more.

From this true life story I hope we wives will be able to understand our assignment in the lives of our husbands. A woman is a suitable helper for her husband whether he is a believer or not as long as they are married. The helpmeet role of the wife is not restricted to financial issues, home keeping or raising children, but that in every area of a man's life where help is needed, the wife has been assigned by God to be a suitable helper fitting to help her husband. This is a God given assignment; it is a primary assignment for which she will give account to God who has assigned her to that role. A lot of times the woman needs to relegate her emotions and feelings to the bottom of her being in order to perform effectively this huge role that God has assigned her to do. May the Lord grant us grace to be the woman He has designed and called us to be.   

You are also welcomed to visit www.thewordthatsuits.com you will be glad that you did.

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