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Saturday, 13 October 2018

Unity in Marriage - A Big Lesson (3)

So, continuing from my last post, the second thing I learned when I ran back to God concerning the frustrating situation in my marriage and the truth that stared me in the face that I could no longer handle the financial situation of my marriage was the importance of deliberately maintaining a flow of communication in my marriage and upholding the unity of my home.
Everything I was going through was such that I saw my husband as wicked and insensitive. I stopped telling him things about myself and the happenings in the home and he didn’t bother to ask. When there was a situation in my home I would look for a means of resolving it first before telling my husband about it and that is if I ever told him. And he also had the mindset that since I was trying to take up his role, he wouldn’t stop me since it was making life easier for him after all.
So, after praying and trusting God, I learned the importance of submission and how it would help me overcome my current challenge, stripe me off my current burden and transfer the responsibility of headship back to my husband. But one other important revelation that came to me was the importance of unity. The importance of "agreement" in my marriage in order to have good success.
So, as I began to submit to my husband, I began to marry my opinions and ideas with his. I learned to submit my ideas to the authority of my husband’s ideas. No matter how much I was convinced that I was right, and he was wrong, I would go by his way. I was able to do this because I always prayed to God that if He demanded that I submit to my husband as unto the Lord as found in Ephesians 5:22-24, then He should fill my husband with His presence such that whatever step or decision my husband takes, it will be God’s decision for the family. And even when it looks so wrong I will still follow and pray that God turns that so wrong decision into a so right decision for our family.
Since I have begun this process we have enjoyed good progress in my family. And because I am constantly on the altar of prayer in my heart, a lot of the decisions that my husband has made has ultimately been for the progress of our family. I will own up to the fact that we still have arguments on very rare occasions but in all, I am enjoying my marriage. 
And then one other thing this has brought to my family is Unity. When I deliberately let my husband be the head while I be the suitable helper, unity began to grow. We were able to agree on a lot of issues and those agreements formed the basis of our prayers to God. So, it wasn’t that my husband was praying for A item while I was busy praying for B which is in direct contrast of what my husband was praying for. With that sorted answers to our prayers were coming fast.
Because my husband noticed and appreciated my efforts in making the marriage a success and he had noticed that I submitted to him, understanding that I wasn’t doing it because I had no ideas or will of my own, but because I recognized him as my husband and head of my family and esteemed him so, he communicated with me more. It was easier for him to open up his mind and thought to me and whatever he told me was a prayer point for me. Even when he told me things I thought might not work well with the family, rather than voice my disagreement, I would pray that God would redirect him to do the right thing. And because I belong to the living God who answers prayers the story always ends in praise.
My husband and I have achieved more as a unit of one people speaking with one voice more than we could ever achieve individually. Jesus says that a house that is divided in itself cannot stand. And so you need to be very deliberate about ensuring and maintaining the unity of your marriage and your home. Never let anything disturb the unity of your marriage, you need to be intentional about it and prayerfully sustain it too and you will achieve good success to the glory of God alone. 

The very first Couple's Clinic from The Word That Suits comes up on the 1st of December 2018 at Chevron Recreational Center. I encourage you to keep the date. I will be speaking and so will a very powerful male mentor Mr. Deji Irawo. It promises to be a for rebuilding marriages and homes. 

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