Friday 15 July 2016

Let's Talk About Divorce

It's another beautiful day, and it's a huge blessing to be alive today. Those in the grave would want to be in your shoes, another chance we have to repent of sins and do the will of God. A little bit of positivity from everyone will add up to give us the positive environment we all need to thrive. May God help us all in Jesus name.

Today, I want to share a bit about divorce, that big word that seem to be the only human solution to every faulty marriage, yet it's the virus that God hates and He tells us in so many places in the Bible how much He hates divorce. I wonder what will become of us if Christ has to divorce us for our continuous unrepentant attitude in our union with Him. Yet as children of God we are called to have the mind of Christ Jesus.

It's interesting that even among Christian leaders, who are called to shepherd the flock of God, they have been found not to be able to resolve their marital issues through the power of God who they claimed called them to service but would rather adopted the divorce option like the non believer and still stand to proclaim to have the power of God to help those in need. Without being judgmental, I am wondering why the same power was not applied to solve their own marital problems? Why didn't the power of God supersede the desire of their flesh to do only that which God approves in the matter of their homes?

So now that the leaders are doing it, the followers believe it's alright. Once that marriage is slightly tending towards a direction the couples didn't prepare for, they file for a divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable differences. Everyone goes their way and marry again and the same thing happens and the whole cycle is repeated. So we have a woman getting married to two or more husbands in her lifetime and at the age of 60, if I will be generous enough, she is living alone and a single mother of three children from three husbands. The society call her names, she carries on a stigma, but can she really be blamed when those who are leading the church and proclaiming the name and power of God are doing just the same thing. So this is a situation of "follow the leader."

Before I go on sounding harsh, let's check on what the Bible says about divorce and check out the position of God on the issue of divorce.

Deuteronomy 24:1
If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house. 

Malachi 2:16
"I hate divorce" says the Lord God of Israel, "and I hate a man's covering himself with violence as well as with his garment," says the Lord Almighty. 

Matthew 5:31-32
"It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.' But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery. 

Matthew 19:3-9
Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?"
"Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female', and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."
 "Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?"
Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife , except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."

I would have loved to explore more Bible verses, but because of the device I am typing it, I'll stop here. From what I am understanding in all that God is saying through these scriptures, God didn't plan divorce for marriage. It was not part of His agenda, neither is it a God's idea of a corrective measure for assumed marital problems. As a matter of  fact God hates divorce. So anyone who divorces his or her spouse does what God hates no matter how spiritually gifted you are.

Jesus said Moses permitted divorce because the heart of men were hard. Obviously if the heart of men were soft as it should be, then there will be no need to divorce. Before you conclude on the divorce proceedings, pause to think, "you have probably resolved that this is the only way to resolve that marital crisis because your heart is hard." Otherwise there are other possible means of resolution to the problem that will not require divorce and first on the list is prayers, followed by forgiveness, love, patience, tolerance and then love again. That its God approach to the problem and not divorce.

For those in marriage or about to marry please note this: Marriage is a call to service, it is you volunteering yourself to God as a tool in His hands to bring about the best in the life of the man or woman you are getting married to. Marriage is not a bed of roses, it is a place of active and continuous work with the help of God in digging out the good values in your spouse and causing him or her to shine bright and impact your life too positively.

When God created man, He saw the man He created and concluded that he was good not perfect. On a reassessment, God said it was not good that man should be alone. So God provided a compliment for the man to make him better and if possible perfect. Two as one is most definitely better than one as one. When you see that man or woman you like and you go to God in prayer over your desire to marry such a person, what you are doing is telling God you are ready to be of service to Him in making the life of the man or woman you desire to marry better. You are volunteering to be a part of and a tool of accomplishment in the success story of your spouse and whatever it takes you are willing to give, so help you God.

This is what marriage is all about. If that was not your intention when you got married to that man or woman, I am sorry to announce to you that, that is what God understands His own marriage to be, so you better put yourself together and get to work. And if you are not yet married, I tell think very well and understand that your spouse success story should not be complete without the mention of your name. Are you ready for the job? What it entails goes beyond love, it is hardworking that comes with various degrees of resistance and valleys and steep mountains that must be climbed. Are you really ready for the job? The thing about this is that once the letter has been issued and agreement is signed and sealed there is no going back. U cannot resign on this particular job, so are you ready?

When we understand the above about marriage, we will appreciate why God hates divorce. We have divorce in marriages when we have it built on a wrong mindset and have faulty preconceptions above the institution. When God instituted marriage, it was about two people helping each other get better and not two disjointed people living together, pulling each other down, living as rivals and competitors. These are the attributes we find in marriage that leads to divorce. Solomon said TWO ARE BETTER THAN ONE, and that is a worthy saying even today.  May God bless our homes.


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