I must apologize for the long break, it was not in any way intentional. I am having issues with my computer, and also was down with a little fever. To the glory of God my health is back, but my computer is yet to come alive. But still the word of God must be shared, and home shall be healed whether the devil likes it or not.
I am in a very thankful mood I must say. Things are not particularly working the way I want them to, but yet, I am where I am not by my strength or the things I know how to do so well, not by my ability or expertise, just by the divine special grace of God. I have to appreciate God for the battles He fights and wins for me that I always never even get to know about. There are so many blessings that we take for granted as though it's our right to have it all working for us. So when I hear of happenings in the lives of others that are not so pleasant I thank God for what I have and take for granted. So when you sometimes feel unfilled don't take it out on God, He is doing much more for you behind the scene than you can ever imagine.
I heard a story of a young lady feeling frustrated and humiliated in her marriage just because her home is dominated by her husband's mother. It gets so bad to the point that she is not allowed into her own kitchen when her mother-in-law comes around. The woman insist she is the one that must cook for her son and that her son can't take the rubbish food cooked by his wife. And when she is leaving, she prepares large quantities of soups for her son and freezes them for him. At some point she openly scolded her son for not taking permission from her before buying his wife a new care. It was the timely intervention of the other siblings of the husband that saved the day. They were the ones who rebuked their mum that she is taking things too far and becoming overbearing. The husband has absolutely no clue on how to handle the situation. He can't stand up to his mum, and can't call her bluff. So all he does is play along and act the script as written by his mum. Now the wife has had enough of the madness and wants out of the union. As far as she is concerned her husband is better off married to his mother.
The story above is real and it's happening not just to the marriage in question, but to many other marriages. And again it brings me to the subject of leaving and cleaving as the Lord has instructed at the onset of every success marriage. In Genesis 2:24 Adam said "for this reason a man will leave father and mother and cleave to his wife," also in Matthew 19:5 Jesus repeated the same thing and Paul gave us a reminder in Ephesians 5:31 of the same saying. It is because of cases like this that God had to keep reminding us of how it should be done in marriage for it to be peaceful, successful and joyful.
What the mother-in-law is doing is what I like to term as over stepping boundaries. If the Lord says it is not good for the man to be alone and made a suitable helper for the man in his wife, it's because God knows that the mother is not fitting to be suitable to her son. But rather to her own husband. A mother is to counsel her children based on her wealth of experience and not to dominate their personal lives when they are of age to be able to take control of their own lives.
For the wife I salute you for your patience and endurance, but going for a divorce is not the way to go. This is not a good enough reason for you to fail God on His assignment for your life as a suitable helper to your husband. Paul says in Romans 13:7-8 that you should give everyone what you owe him; if you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then pay revenue; if respect, then respect; if honour then honour. Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellow-man fulfilled the law. So you owe your mother-in-law respect, honour and love. This the Lord will grant you grace and strength to pay despite the harshness of hers towards you.
But in your closet, you need to pray very hard and remind God of His words which says for "for this reason a man will leave father and mother and cleave to his wife," Pray that the Lord will break every unhealthy hold or attachment that your husband's mother has over him that is affecting the peace of your home and marriage. You need not get confrontational with your husband or his mother over the matter. The Lord who made you a suitable helper to him will fight for you and you will hold your peace. Be sure the Lord will fight for you, just keep your peace and never stop praying.
This scenario is also applicable to the husbands too. There are cases where the wife's mother moves in and runs the home of her daughter as though she is the wife. In such a case, I will encourage the man to be man enough to politely walk his mother-in-law out of his home. He married the daughter not the mother. Young husbands and wives should be allowed to discover themselves and allow God lead them to the land of milk and honey called marriage without the burden of extra luggage called in-laws.
I am in a very thankful mood I must say. Things are not particularly working the way I want them to, but yet, I am where I am not by my strength or the things I know how to do so well, not by my ability or expertise, just by the divine special grace of God. I have to appreciate God for the battles He fights and wins for me that I always never even get to know about. There are so many blessings that we take for granted as though it's our right to have it all working for us. So when I hear of happenings in the lives of others that are not so pleasant I thank God for what I have and take for granted. So when you sometimes feel unfilled don't take it out on God, He is doing much more for you behind the scene than you can ever imagine.
I heard a story of a young lady feeling frustrated and humiliated in her marriage just because her home is dominated by her husband's mother. It gets so bad to the point that she is not allowed into her own kitchen when her mother-in-law comes around. The woman insist she is the one that must cook for her son and that her son can't take the rubbish food cooked by his wife. And when she is leaving, she prepares large quantities of soups for her son and freezes them for him. At some point she openly scolded her son for not taking permission from her before buying his wife a new care. It was the timely intervention of the other siblings of the husband that saved the day. They were the ones who rebuked their mum that she is taking things too far and becoming overbearing. The husband has absolutely no clue on how to handle the situation. He can't stand up to his mum, and can't call her bluff. So all he does is play along and act the script as written by his mum. Now the wife has had enough of the madness and wants out of the union. As far as she is concerned her husband is better off married to his mother.
The story above is real and it's happening not just to the marriage in question, but to many other marriages. And again it brings me to the subject of leaving and cleaving as the Lord has instructed at the onset of every success marriage. In Genesis 2:24 Adam said "for this reason a man will leave father and mother and cleave to his wife," also in Matthew 19:5 Jesus repeated the same thing and Paul gave us a reminder in Ephesians 5:31 of the same saying. It is because of cases like this that God had to keep reminding us of how it should be done in marriage for it to be peaceful, successful and joyful.
What the mother-in-law is doing is what I like to term as over stepping boundaries. If the Lord says it is not good for the man to be alone and made a suitable helper for the man in his wife, it's because God knows that the mother is not fitting to be suitable to her son. But rather to her own husband. A mother is to counsel her children based on her wealth of experience and not to dominate their personal lives when they are of age to be able to take control of their own lives.
For the wife I salute you for your patience and endurance, but going for a divorce is not the way to go. This is not a good enough reason for you to fail God on His assignment for your life as a suitable helper to your husband. Paul says in Romans 13:7-8 that you should give everyone what you owe him; if you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then pay revenue; if respect, then respect; if honour then honour. Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellow-man fulfilled the law. So you owe your mother-in-law respect, honour and love. This the Lord will grant you grace and strength to pay despite the harshness of hers towards you.
But in your closet, you need to pray very hard and remind God of His words which says for "for this reason a man will leave father and mother and cleave to his wife," Pray that the Lord will break every unhealthy hold or attachment that your husband's mother has over him that is affecting the peace of your home and marriage. You need not get confrontational with your husband or his mother over the matter. The Lord who made you a suitable helper to him will fight for you and you will hold your peace. Be sure the Lord will fight for you, just keep your peace and never stop praying.
This scenario is also applicable to the husbands too. There are cases where the wife's mother moves in and runs the home of her daughter as though she is the wife. In such a case, I will encourage the man to be man enough to politely walk his mother-in-law out of his home. He married the daughter not the mother. Young husbands and wives should be allowed to discover themselves and allow God lead them to the land of milk and honey called marriage without the burden of extra luggage called in-laws.
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