Who is Responsibile for the Training of the Children?

 

It is generally believed that the children in a family are the responsibility of the mother. So, how the children in the home turn out is a duty the society has placed on the shoulders of the mothers. And I believe this is also a duty the mothers have embraced with grace. But I want to say that this is just a traditional standard; it is a bit different from what we will find when we do a deep dive into the Bible. So, in today’s blog, I want to share a perspective that is a bit different from the traditional norm we are used to.

As a mother, I will say an average mother is a nurturer; we are built with some valuable inherent traits and characteristics that are needed to nurture. A mother is naturally caring, protective, discerning, and pretty attentive to details. It is just very natural for a woman to be conscious of the minute detail in the change in character, pattern, and behavior of her child that no one else will take note of. In most cases, the mother is quick to understand what the baby needs by the slightest cry unless it is beyond her knowledge. She is quick to notice body changes as the child grows and develops. She is quick to notice the unique qualities of her children, and if this mother has a strong relationship with God, the level of her discernment is even greatly heightened. So, these qualities of a mother make it easy to commit to her the responsibility of training the children.

But after my romance with the Bible, I discovered that when God is demanding an account over the turnout of any household and, in fact, the children of the household, He holds the fathers accountable. In Genesis 18:19, we see why God chose Abraham. The Bible tells us so that he may command (train) his children and his household to keep the way of the Lord and do righteousness and justice. Here, we see that God didn’t think or believe that Sarah would train or command her children after the Lord, but He chose Abraham, the ideal head of the family, to shoulder that responsibility.

Also, considering the case of the rich man Job in Job 1:5, it was Job, who was the head of the home and the one responsible for the moral uprightness of the members of his home, who took the time to purify his children after every festive period, and not Job’s wife. And when the children of Prophet Eli sinned against God in 1 Samuel 3 & 4, Eli, who failed to train his children well, died alongside the erring children. Nothing was said of his wife being punished for the sins of her children.

It is very okay to charge mothers to nurture their children and watch every aspect of their growth—morally, academically, physically, and most importantly, spiritually. However, fathers should not be absolved of their important role in bringing their children up in the way of the Lord. A father’s role is not limited to financial provision in the lives of their children. Still, understanding that they will give account over the lives of the children the Lord has given them, they must understand the grave importance of training their children right amid their very busy schedules. Job was the richest man among the men of the East in his time, which would have made him a very busy man, but he was never too busy to purify his children.

Both parents play extremely vital roles in their children's lives. The mothers are the nurturers and caregivers. They possess the love, protectiveness, and inherent qualities that adequately qualify them for the job. However, the fathers have a bigger assignment in this matter. They are answerable to God over their children's lives, so the children's moral upbringing is their responsibility. Even at that, the support of the mother is highly required in this assignment, but she is not to be held responsible for the moral development of a child; she only operates on the capacity of support.

In conclusion, I will say that for parents to deliver optimum value in raising their children, they must practice what they preach and do what they teach. You can’t give what you don’t have. The training of a child or children starts with the training of oneself.

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