My Book Store

Monday, 17 April 2017

I Just Love LOVE

I want to start my gist today by saying that I love LOVE. I wonder who doesn’t anyway. I love to love and be loved. One of my favorite songs is the love song by late Teddy Pendagrass that say “to beloved and love in return in the greatest thing that my heart desires.” I find myself in synced with that love song so very much.
But one truth about love is that it is earned. Some talk about love at first sight, but in truth that’s not love, its infatuation. True love takes time to grow and develop. But for true love to develop, something has to give. Just like everything that grows, love begins with a seed. Sometimes just a smile, a kind word, a helping hand, your appearance, carriage, composure, intellect and so many other things can form a basis for love to grow. These are seeds that germinate into love. So if you love LOVE like I do then you can’t demand it or enforce it, you need to sow a seed for it, nurture the seed that you have sown and then watch it grow.
Love in marriage follows the same pattern; its starts with a seed of love sown and then nurtured to grow. I understand that God instructs the husband to love their wives as themselves and as Christ loves the church, but this love doesn’t just appear. Its easier for the man to love his wife when she is wise enough to sow the seed of love in him and nurture it to grow.
I have heard some men (my husband inclusive) say with pride that their wives taught them to love. They are not ashamed to say it because in truth it is a thing of pride to help your husband love you more. Every man created by God has the capacity to love, but that capacity is put into full use when they have people around them who just make them to want to keep loving. In that case, the capacity to love is fully maximized.
A wise woman who loves Love like I do will make effort at igniting the love in her husband for her. No matter how deeply buried that love is, she needs to learn to dig it up. She needs to keep digging it up with deeds and acts and even words that will do nothing else but make her husband want to love her all the more. Because there is no feeling as good as knowing and being confident that your husband or wife loves you to the moon and back. And when you put up the appropriate acts and words that will enhance the growth of your husband's love for you, then crown all your efforts with prayers. There is no sin in you praying to God daily that your husband loves you more than he did the day before. And you can be sure that when your deeds and actions are right and your words to your husband are right, then God has something to work with in answering your prayers. 
The things you say and do to your husband always, should be words and actions that will light up the fire of love for you in your husband. Even when he is putting up a front, don’t get distracted, don’t get dismayed because you have a goal you are pursuing and that goal is to make sure you bring out the love that God has placed inside of your husband for you and that goal must be achieved.
If you ask me if its possible to fire up the flames of love in your husband, I will say a big YES. And if you ask me how, I will tell you that the answer cannot be generalized, because what appeals to Mr. A might not appeal to Mr. B. But what can be generalized is that a wife prayerfully submits to her husband; the use of words that are sweet as honeycomb and healing to the soul are part of the seeds you need to sow in order to ignite your husband’s love for you. Also I will say that your physical appearance is also a huge factor that attracts your husband to you (Looking good is good business), and then quite a lot men love their wives being domesticated. So these are some of the seeds that you can sow in your marriage that are likely to grow into your husband loving you and expressing his love for you.
Digging up the love of your husband is so very important for the success of your marriage because the pursue your own assignment as a suitable helper to your husband is made a lot easier when you have the love and cooperation of your husband. Its common knowledge that its so easy and convenient to be a suitable helper to a loving husband; as you would have given your life to serving him without even knowing it. But what a huge and tiring task it is to have to be a suitable helper to a husband who does not love you. Its just a matter of time before you give up on God and throwing in the towel on your marriage when your husband isn’t showing you any love or appreciation.
So when you get into marriage, the first pursuit is to gain and retain your husband’s love you. All other home building tasks becomes easy to accomplish with the love of your husband for you secured and guaranteed. 
But I will plead with women not to dig out the love of any man who is not their husbands. This digging out of love should be solely for married couples, and in the same vain, women should not give their love to men who are not their husbands. Love is sweet yet very dangerous when not applied right (Song of songs 8:6-7). Love is too strong to be toyed with, so we use it very carefully and apply it appropriately.
May the Lord bless our homes. 


  1. Good day Sir/MA, can you kindly give me one scriptural reference where it's recorded that a woman should work hard to dig out her husband's love.

    1. 1 Peter 3:1-3. There you'll find that it is through the reference and purity in the life of her husband that a godly wife will win her husband over to God. A man who fears God is a man who will appreciate and value his wife.
      If as a wife you don't feel the need to dig out the love in your husband then it's just okay. Everyone applies the approach that works for them. Bottom-line, it's your marriage and you approach it the way it suits you best.