I am so sorry for taking another few days off; I am still
tied down with working on the book “Marriage Handbook.” It’s a compilation of
all the marriage post I have shared on this blog and I am really blown away by
what insight is contained in those messages. Those messages are not my ability in any way,
they can only come from God. Just trying to edit them has been a huge lesson
for me.
In my last post we discussed on the issue of why it is
wrong for a wife to try to correct her husband. We also discussed that men
and women are not mate in marriage and established the fact that the man is the
head of his wife the woman. But if we leave the discussion there, it will be an
imbalanced approach to the hierarchy of things in marriage and the men/husband
might as well just take an undue advantage of their wives in the home in the name of being superior to her. So here
is the return leg of the discussion.
Malachi 2:13-14, 16
Another thing you do: You flood the Lord’s altar with
tears. You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings
or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, “Why?” It is because
the Lord is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth,
because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of
your marriage covenant.
“I hate divorce,” says the Lord God of Israel, “and I hate
a man’s covering himself with violence as well as with his garment,” says the
Lord Almighty. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith.
1 Peter 3:7
Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with
your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and heirs with
you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
I have made references to these two Bible passages
countless times and it’s always new and fresh and with new meaning each time.
It is very true that the head of the wife/woman is the man and also very true
that it is out of the wife’s scope of assignment to try to correct her husband
or enforce her opinion on him. A wife will be playing her role well if she is
in submission to her husband. But this wife who should be and is in submission
to her husband is very fragile and delicate to the fulfillment of her husband’s
destiny. She is the neck that holds the head in place. She is that precious
partner of the man that should be treated with love and care. A man who wants
to truncate his own destiny will begin his own undoing by treating his wife
unfairly.
The wife is so very delicate and important that the Lord
had to warn the men to guard themselves in their spirit and be careful not to
break faith with the wife of their youth. The fact that your wife cannot
correct or instruct you does not translate to the fact that she is a brainless
glorified housemaid in your life. It is the height of ignorance that will make
a man to show respect and honor even for his children above his wife as some
men do.
God said that for this reason a man will leave his father
and mother and cleave to his wife and the two will become one in flesh and
spirit. And then Jesus said in Matthew 18:19 that if two agree on earth about
anything they ask for, it will be done for then by our Father in Heaven. Which
better two can agree concerning a thing and ask same of God and be assured that
what they have asked for will be done for them if not the two of a husband and
wife who God has made one in flesh and spirit.
So what you need to understand as a man is that there are
some requests that you will make of God that will remain on the pending tray of
heaven until your wife co-signs and agrees with you on that request. No wonder
Paul says that a man needs to treat his wife with respect and be considerate as
he lives with her so that nothing will hinder his prayers. There are some
prayers you will utter as a man that will not go beyond the mouth with which
you have uttered them because your wife is not in agreement with your prayer request.
So you see why I said that your wife might be the weaker
one, she might be fragile but she is very important to the fulfillment of your
destiny and you will go far when you treat her with love, respect and you are
considerate with her as you live with her. Your wife is not allowed to correct
you, in fact she is to reverence you and hold you in very high esteem. The measure
of reverence she gives to God is what the Lord has demanded of her to give to
you as her husband but she is also allowed to pray for you and believe me you
need those prayers from her lips more than you know. I am not very vast with
the Bible but I have read where God threatened not to pay attention to the
prayers of a man, but I am yet to come across where God threatened not to pay
attention to the prayers of the wife (I am not saying it does not exist, just
that I have not found it yet). So if your wife is not in sin, she is sure that
her prayers will receive attention from God.
For the wife reading this, you are more important in the
life of your husband than you can ever imagine. You are the salt in his
life that gives it a whole new state of sweetness. Don’t ever feel that you can’t
make an impact in the life of your husband just because you are not allowed to
correct him when he is wrong. The effect of your prayers far outweighs the
correction with words. Prayer does more in correcting than open rebuke. You
sure don’t know the magnitude of what you are capable of achieving through God
in prayers. Put prayers to work and rest your case in God you will have the
last laugh and enjoy peace in your marriage.
May the Lord bless our homes.
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