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Monday, 21 November 2016

It’s Time to Change That Mindset 2

It’s a new day and a new week, and its almost the end of the 11th month of the year; God has kept us this far and personally I just want to give all the praise and glory and honor to Him. And again it's a very good feeling to share something valuable on this blog and impact your marriage in a positive way. I thank God for His word and I pray that our lives, marriages and home will please God and give us all round peace. I have come to discover that when a man and his wife are at peace with each other and I mean genuine peace and not pretense, there is prosperity in such a home. I plead with you to try it out and get back to me on your personal experience on this piece of experiment. Let your husband win all the arguments if you are the wife, and let your wife win all the arguments if you are the husband. First there will be peace in your home and then you will begin to discover that prosperity is creeping little by little. Just do away with your will to be right and see what happens next.

In my last post I promised to deliver the part B of the changing mindset post; one that speaks to the men. There are areas of marriage norm and culture that we have lived with and used as a yardstick to measure the performance of our spouses, but when these traditional norms are not giving us the desired result, then its important to change our mindset and measure the performance of our marriage based on different set of values.

Below are some areas where the men need to change their mindset when it comes to their marriage. Please just give these new values a good consideration, hopefully we will have better marital experiences with them.

  • Your wife is your suitable helper; she is God’s assigned helper for your life that enables you succeed exceedingly. It’s like a man on assignment and he needs tools to succeed on that assignment. Without these tools he will fail woefully. Now what God has done for you as a man is to package all that you need for success in your assignment for God and all other areas of your life and put them all in the wife He has given to you as your suitable helper. So Proverbs 18:22 says “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.” Your wife is that container in which the Lord has package all that you need to succeed in life; she is the favor of God in your life in the form of a person. Rather than disdain and maltreat her, you better start handling her with care and love.
  • The secret to unleashing your God given deposit packaged inside your wife is by loving her. Do you desire that your wife be all that you want her to be and more? Try loving her unconditionally and you will be surprised at the extent to which she would pour herself out for you. It is often said that women have the capacity to multiply whatever you give to them so if you desire to reap the best qualities from your wife, then give her your best and it will be returned to you in multiple fold.
  • Maltreating your wife is a very wrong approach to handling the mistakes your wife does or the things you perceive not right about her. When you maltreat your wife, you stand the risk of having your prayers not answered by God (Malachi 2:13-14 and 1 Peter 3:7). When you maltreat your wife, you mishandle God's favor for your life. If you then do that, is it possible to go back to God for another gift? Obviously not. If you really need the favor of God in your life, then begin by taking good care of the container of favor that God has blessed you with - the wife of your youth. The best way to right the wrong in the life of your wife is to love her. God requires unconditional love from you to your wife and so when your wife does anything that displeases you, correct her in love and go the extra mile, pray for her. Pray and don’t stop praying until you see the desired changes in the life of your wife. 
In a nutshell, when you change your approach from seeing your wife as that woman who should just bear you children and rear them for you, cook your meals and be quiet when you speak and you form an habit of showing unconditional love and care for her, then you have the best woman in the world as your wife. If you desire to be the king of your home and in the life of your wife, then you should begin by making your wife the queen of your life. It’s just that simple. 

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